When I Don't Feel Like It

Reading, thinking and praying this morning. Praying for people and situations. Praying for Nepal and Baltimore. Praying also for places I have visited over the years... Upstate New York... Montreal... Pittsburgh... Des Moines... Omaha... Indianapolis... Cincinnati... St Pete... Miami... Boston... Salem... Then reading some more and praying some more.

"For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil. Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others. But what we are is known to God, and I hope it is known also to your conscience." - 2 Corinthians 5:10-11 ESV

"Does he thank the servant because he did what was commanded? So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.' " - Luke 17:9-10 ESV

Sometimes when I don't feel well I start to think, 'Will this be my excuse? Will I stop being creative? Will grace be just for me and will I just let everyone fend for themselves?'

It is very possible that we could slip into unprofitable servant mode when really we are sons and daughters. We are not hirelings just in it for the payoff. Believers believe and are invested in God's kingdom because they have been brought into the family. Our Father has a vision and a plan and we come under that vision and make it our vision.

When I don't feel well I don't want to do what I usually want to do. I don't feel like wanting to extend myself. Maybe it's good that some feeling are at a low ebb because now I can choose by principle and not by passion. Now in this state I can make a faith decision.

So, I pray and think and read. I let the water of the Word of God wash over me. I tell my soul to rejoice. More seems impossible to me so I pray for the impossible. God can do the impossible.

Grace is known to my conscience... not just right and wrong... grace. Grace motivates me. Grace tells me I don't have to work to be accepted. I am accepted right now. It also tells me I don't have to wallow in my weakness.

"If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you. So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God." - Romans 8:11-14 ESV

I don't live in debt to God or to my body. God has made me a son and I take on the role of a servant because that is what a son does when visitors come to the house. He serves them. He becomes a representation of the Father's hospitality.

The judgement seat of Christ will not be about the contents of our thoughts. It is a reward seat and only rewards will be handed out. Those rewards are going to be based on faith decisions that resulted in faith actions.

Places need Jesus. People need Jesus. If I have visited or heard of a place then I can pray for that place. If I know about a situation then what will I do with that knowledge? Perhaps God is not leading me to go there or do anything else but pray. I want to be led by God. Many times it has been in times of prayer that I have been led to act. I want to be available to that.

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