"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves." - James 1:19-22 ESV
Grace, mercy, love... unsentimental love... put away the 'filthiness' and be slow to anger. We remember that people are not a project for you to fix.
I see the plural nature of 'which is able to save your souls' as referring to us and the people we are listening to. Perhaps what they are saying might be prone to make us angry but are we hearing their point of view? Are we referencing the 'implanted word' in our mind as they are speaking so that we have a life-giving reply ready as the Holy Spirit manifests the risen Christ through us?
Part of 'doing' here is not fighting fire with fire and burning the relationship down. Doing might be a 'kind answer' that has clarity and eternal content. We can know about grace but not give it. That is one option. We can also listen and respond instead of react. We can be slow to react and then respond with love because we are listening to the person but looking at Heaven's heart.
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